Thursday, October 4, 2012

From TIME GOES BY | Loneliness and Old Age

 Loneliness and Old Age:

Ms Bennett has a very interesting subject here and since for technical reasons, I don't seem to be able to comment within her Comment section, I will just do it right here...but first, read her blog and then return.

I would probably believe the Terman Longevity Study before I would the others. I am lonely at times but it's often by choice or by temperament. I've been a 'loner' all of my life. As an INFP personality type I am extremely introverted. People wear me out! While I was in the Navy I always asked for the 'graveyard' shifts and loved them. During my career in the construction industry I always worked alone. I was foreman and I was a superintendent and you don't make friends in those positions; you might have to fire a 'friend'. As an estimator I had to be alone during the work day. Estimators were not to be disturbed because we were always counting things.

Now don't get the wrong idea; I was not anti-social. I went to all the company functions...and left early. I traded jokes with the people I worked with. But I rarely had anything in common with most of those people. I  remember quite vividly the making a friend during my days of working with my tools on. During a conversation at lunch, I discovered that he read...books! Finding someone like that on a construction site is very rare and we became very good friends.

Now 72 and retired (by choice) for almost nine years, I find that my time on the internet, my time with my artist friends, my time at church...are enough for most times. I know that I can find other sources for friendship but my 'standards' are often too high. Like that friend from long ago, I'm always looking for someone who reads...books.

I paint once a week with a group of eight other painters. They all read books. We talk more than we paint. Painting is our excuse for getting together. I scour the internet for others who read books and I've found plenty of them. We haven't met in person but I think of them as friends. Ar our church we have four pastors and they are all intellectuals who believe that there is a way for science and religion to get along. We work with the University of California, Chico (nest door) in a series of seminars about science and religion. We work with other faiths and have sponsored seminars with local Muslims as guests. I own a Koran and read it. (now and then)

But I digress...(I'm 72 and it's allowed) what I was getting at was the fact that I can choose to be lonely...or not. And this would have been my comment on Ms Bennett's blog this morning.

'via Blog this'


  1. As we have found out before I am like you in a lot of ways. I was a letter carrier and spent two hours in the office sorting the route and then the rest of the day by myself delivering the mail. It was ideal. I've read one book after the other since I first learned to read. Subscribe to a lot of magazines. I am social only when my wife cajoles me into a social event.

  2. Wally,

    so true...we are very much alike. And I read your blog every time you post something. I don't always comment but I do read it and enjoy it.