From TIME GOES BY | Loneliness and Old Age

 Loneliness and Old Age:

Ms Bennett has a very interesting subject here and since for technical reasons, I don't seem to be able to comment within her Comment section, I will just do it right here...but first, read her blog and then return.

I would probably believe the Terman Longevity Study before I would the others. I am lonely at times but it's often by choice or by temperament. I've been a 'loner' all of my life. As an INFP personality type I am extremely introverted. People wear me out! While I was in the Navy I always asked for the 'graveyard' shifts and loved them. During my career in the construction industry I always worked alone. I was foreman and I was a superintendent and you don't make friends in those positions; you might have to fire a 'friend'. As an estimator I had to be alone during the work day. Estimators were not to be disturbed because we were always counting things.

Now don't get the wrong idea; I was not anti-social. I went to all the company functions...and left early. I traded jokes with the people I worked with. But I rarely had anything in common with most of those people. I  remember quite vividly the making a friend during my days of working with my tools on. During a conversation at lunch, I discovered that he read...books! Finding someone like that on a construction site is very rare and we became very good friends.

Now 72 and retired (by choice) for almost nine years, I find that my time on the internet, my time with my artist friends, my time at church...are enough for most times. I know that I can find other sources for friendship but my 'standards' are often too high. Like that friend from long ago, I'm always looking for someone who reads...books.

I paint once a week with a group of eight other painters. They all read books. We talk more than we paint. Painting is our excuse for getting together. I scour the internet for others who read books and I've found plenty of them. We haven't met in person but I think of them as friends. Ar our church we have four pastors and they are all intellectuals who believe that there is a way for science and religion to get along. We work with the University of California, Chico (nest door) in a series of seminars about science and religion. We work with other faiths and have sponsored seminars with local Muslims as guests. I own a Koran and read it. (now and then)

But I digress...(I'm 72 and it's allowed) what I was getting at was the fact that I can choose to be lonely...or not. And this would have been my comment on Ms Bennett's blog this morning.






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